The Life of a Princess in the South

As part of the awareness raising this year on HIV/AIDS problem globally, I am sticking this blog entry at the front page until 1st week of December. For everybody’s information, December 1 is World AIDS Day. I would like to thank also the people who shared their views with this entry months ago. It is a pleasure to exchange wonderful experiences and ideas with you irregardless of race, religion, gender, and geographical location. For those who haven’t read this, why don’t you try reading and share your views afterwards? Have fun reading and interacting.

It’s been a long time that I wanted to write something about HIV and AIDS. Yes you heard me right, it is the disease taboo to many society. Are you intrigued? Surprised to hear something from a Muslim woman perspective in east asia, right? But I shall tell you, read first before any judgements, then you can throw anything at me afterwards (just no physical stuffs, it hurts physically you know).

What drives me to share something on this was my experience in Bangkok, Thailand way back April 2007. Every time I hear these like Bangkok, Thailand, condoms, HIV, and AIDS, I can’t stop myself from laughing and sharing my stories to friends. And shouting it to the world through my blog, I am telling you, really takes courage for a young Muslim lady like me. Right now, something is playing in my mind… criticisms will go my way or worst? I don’t know… I will find out after few months posting this. So here is my unforgettable experience:

Yen (a friend and a colleague) and I break away from our group and went to Siam Paragon to do a little shopping after a farewell dinner at Cabagges and Condoms. Then Yen and I has to go on our own way looking for our what-to-buy list to maximize the time since it’s already late. So I was looking for the camera and accessories section. But because Siam Paragon is very huge, I have to ask a guy who I assumed was a security personnel or something like that at the shopping mall. We cannot understand each other. I asked him if where I can find Canon booth or section. But he just can not answer me because he can not understand nor speak English. So I have to bring out and show my camera to him. Unconsciously, all the condoms at more than 30 of numbers I put inside my bag from Cabbages and Condoms resto fell down at the floor showing different kinds of sizes, Republican and Democrat! I just quoted C&C for the sizes. I don’t even know what’s the different with those sizes! And why Republican and Democrat? I do not know!

All I know, I was really embarrassed with what happened. I was flushing with embarrassment whilst picking up condoms on the floor with the man in my front. I can see in his eyes thoughts of surprise, or maybe he was thinking more than that! Whatever a man/woman can think about “a woman possessing plenty of condoms in her bag!”. Moreover, my being a young Muslim lady carrying too many condoms is such a very rare episode. It was also my first time to bring any condom with me without any intention to use it for pleasure. That episode flashed me back into my day-to-day society, where condoms is seldom heard and is a taboo. I can not help thinking what would people’s reaction when it happen to my society where I was born and raised? Will they going to outcast me? But I was for sure, that gossips and exaggerated hearsays will spread all over my town until to the last person that knew me, and knew my father, mother, and relatives. Suddenly, I was back into the present still till picking up the piece of condoms left without looking at the man. I stood up and said thank you, and I was like The Flash gone away. I was totally embarrassed, and confused if I have to laugh at myself or blame myself for picking up those stuffs at the resto. I reflected with my actions, and after all, I realised that I have a very honest and good intention that I should not blame myself for what had happened. After all, Allah judges us through our intentions and actions. But one thing I am thankful, it did not happen in my place for I don not want to bring shame to my family just because of that incident – for small thing can be a start of a huge anxieties.

I know that a man’s curiosity will ask why I had plenty of condoms in my bag. It is only because of one reason, I want to bring it back here in my home country and give it to my colleagues as a “pasalubong” – Filipino term and traditional practices that means anything you give to someone when you return to your country after a stay overseas. The condoms are FREE in C&Cs! We are all tempted to get one or many. There was even an inviting signboard saying “Sorry, we don’t have mints… get condoms instead.” It was first time I read a line like that, and it was in Bangkok where prostitution is legalized. Another surprising thing in Bangkok!

I even had plenty of photos there with the mannequins wearing cool dresses made up of condoms! I think that there is nothing wrong with what I did, but it is very unusual or rare to read/hear straight from a person like me. But you knew it now, it is something that I can not forget and will haunt me forever if I can not put it into writing.

Alas! I have written it. But the other side of the coin is that, it is a risky thing in my part. I would accept a criticism, which is part of blogosphere. To tell you frankly, here in my country, HIV and AIDS is a silent issue. It is making a “silent noise” in the lives of the most vulnerable. What I would like to tell you is that it is very seldom you hear people talking about it, the affected are hiding and cannot be traced, yet, alarmingly the number is increasing. Why are these people hiding? It is because they want to avoid discrimination, prejudice, and turn into outcast from their society. But the negative impact is, the more it is difficult for the advocates and the service providers to alleviate the increasing number of affected persons and prevent the escalation of disease.

I think it is about time to start talking about it in developing countries. As to how in Mindanao context? Let’s do consultation with the religious sectors. In the first place, they play important role in shapening the society we have. And they are the gatekeepers too in this subject matter… This is really a challenging work. Very very challenging, I shall say, promise. Acceptance by the community to tackle this issue is the first thing that we should establish. For the meantime, my personal movement is to start sharing bits of information that will be useful for others. Just hang around my blog because I will be posting more specific about this issue.

What about you? Can you share any experiences related to mine? Below are the photos I want to share.

P.S.
Correct me if I am wrong, but those words and theme for this post I have mentioned is a big taboo in my society. And you can’t blame my society especially from the western perspective (sorry if I generalized, but it’s not meant to be). Because I live in a society where religious principles and morality is uphold (it’s not a generalization but at least that is my society and cultural upbringing)

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